#11 The cost of personal care

Are you a high-maintenance girl (or guy)?

Lately, I’ve been thinking about the average monthly cost of my self-care routine and whether it’s become excessive. I might not appear conspicuously high-maintenance—no inch-long eyelash extensions here—but the subtle stuff adds up fast too. Navigating beauty and aging (not old, but certainly not getting any younger…) in this era requires a recalibration of priorities. For instance, my commitment to my nail-care expert—whom I briefly mentioned in my Philly guide—is non-negotiable. She’s that good. Still, I wonder: Am I being over-the-top, or is this just borderline ‘normal’ maintenance these days?

Here’s a breakdown of my regular routine, things I’m curious to try, and the services I’ve retired. This list primarily focuses on beauty and aesthetics—no fitness or mental health practices included. Please weigh in, as I’d love to hear about your routines too!

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Regular routines

• Gel Manicures: My most consistent self-care ritual is visiting Anh at Atelier Anaiis every three weeks or so. Depending on the complexity of the nail art, it ranges from $150 to $200+ after tip. Anh dedicates nearly two hours to removing old polish, meticulously tending to my nail beds and cuticles, and perfecting the new design. As small as it sounds, having well-kept nails makes me feel more put together. I also talk and gesture with my hands a lot so a chipped nail would drive me nuts.

• Pedicures: In spring and summer, I usually schedule pedicures every three weeks (often polish-free), costing about $50-60 each. I’m lazier with these in winter, letting the frequency slide.

• Hydrafacials: About once a quarter, I indulge in a Hydrafacial, which feels like a deep clean for my pores and a glass of water for my skin. I scored a 4-pack with booster from Ever/Body during a sale, reducing the per-session cost to around $243. For a quicker refresh, Glowbar’s 30-minute facials are a more wallet-friendly option. If I ever need a one-off pick-me-up, I’ll book more of a specialty facial at Sofie Pavitt or Rescue Spa.

• Haircuts: Since recently chopping my hair into a proper bob, I’ve realized it will demand more maintenance—bobs are far less forgiving than longer styles. I’ll likely have to commit to trims every 6-8 weeks to keep the shape looking sharp. Each cut runs $150-200. I don’t need to get into my full hair spiel again, and the absolute rollercoaster it went on in the past few months!

• Deep Tissue Massage: About once or twice a year, I get a massage with Maggie at Green Point Spa in Brooklyn. She’s incredible—it hurts so good. At $95 for 90 minutes, it’s one of the best deals for a truly transformative session. If I’m feeling indulgent, I’ll stretch it to 120 minutes. I haven’t quite found a “Maggie” in Philadelphia yet!

Recent nails, recent chop

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Services I’ve retired (for the time being)

• Lash Lifts: For the uninitiated, lash lifts are basically perms for your eyelashes. And let me tell you, for someone with stubbornly straight lashes, they were a revelation. Imagine waking up with perfectly curled lashes, skipping the curler, and shaving a full 20 seconds off my morning routine—life-changing! (I’m being half-serious, though.) Plus, being able to work out and sweat and still have cute lashes was great. AND they freed up valuable space in my travel dopp kit. Were these justifications a little ridiculous? Absolutely. But at $200+ per session, I eventually phased them out to prioritize nail care. I went crawling back to my Surratt lash curler (the only one I would recommend!).

Post lash lift. It cracks me up that some of my friends are genetically blessed with curled lashes and would find it unhinged how much time and money I had to spend doing these.

• Brow Lamination: I used to get my brows laminated for about $140/session but swapped that for at-home tricks. Got2B hair gel on a spoolie or Milk Makeup’s KUSH fiber brow gel gives me similar fluffy brow results. And I know others have had success with at-home lamination kits for a fraction of the cost. This was one of the easiest services to give up.

• Lip Filler: I tried lip filler once, opting for half a syringe at $600. The result was barely noticeable. The numbing cream was worse than the procedure—it seeped into my mouth, tasted awful and made my mouth and tongue completely numb. If I ever try again, I’d be curious to skip the numbing cream (though that might be an ill-advised experiment). To date, I have not tried filler in other parts of my face or Botox. I’m afraid to be reliant on yet another maintenance cost.

• Invisalign and Teeth Whitening: Two years ago, I dove back into orthodontics after realizing that retainers are meant to be worn for life (try telling that to your 15 year old self who just finished braces for two years). Along with Invisalign came additional cosmetic fixes ($$$$). And an in-office whitening session that, frankly, was one of the most painful experiences of my life. When someone compliments my teeth now, I just think, "If only you knew."

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Curious experiments

• Spray Tans: A few days of running in the sun has already left me with a stubborn shorts tan. I’m curious whether a spray tan could even things out or if it would just maintain the existing contrast levels.

• Pico Laser: I’ve been contemplating this treatment for sun damage and brown spots. I’ve tried Clear and Brilliant, but it felt too gentle and required multiple sessions for real results. The post-treatment redness and rough texture are drawbacks, but I’m tempted to give it another shot if the final result is worth it.

• Laser Hair Removal: As I’ve gotten older, I’ve noticed more upper lip hairs than I can keep up with plucking. I’d love a more permanent solution, but I worry about subjecting my lip area, which is sensitive and prone to hives with even the slightest provocation, to the trauma of the laser.

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Ultimately, all these routines are supposed to simplify my day-to-day. The irony is how much effort (and investment) it takes to make things feel effortless. It's a strange balance—doing enough to feel good while avoiding the trap of endless upkeep.

So, what’s your approach? Do you have routines you swear by or treatments you've let go? I’d love to know where you draw the line.